Well, it is Sunday morning and a beautiful 77 degrees outside. My day is going to consist of finishing this post, going for a walk/jog, and then going to pick my son up from a weekend at his father's house. First thing I'm actually enjoying. I have no idea who will read this or even if anyone will, but there is something relaxing about simply writing it all down. I've always kept a diary/journal. My whole life I've carted one around with me and even though I don't write every single day... I do write enough that years go by and I'll eventually sit down and read the old ones. When this happens, it's like all my emotions are turned up to maximum because whatever I wrote about it is either extremely funny, extremely sad, or extremely frustrating! It's like I feel all those emotions all over again just in a magnified way. Any woman out there reading this is probably thinking, "Why on earth would anyone want to do that to themselves?? Isn't dealing with those emotions the FIRST time around difficult enough??" And you would be correct. I am a very emotional person. My ex husband always told me that I am ruled by my emotions and it should be the other way around. But I am who I am and there is a part of me that enjoys going back in time through my own personal journal entries and re-experiencing something that happened to me.
Second thing, going for my walk/jogs all started about 4 weeks ago, when the weather finally cooperated with me, because my best friend is getting married in June and I'm attempting to make myself look a little better physically before I walk down the isle in front of her. :) I have heard so many woman say this so many hundreds of times, but I still fell into the same trap of feeling like my body needing a little improving before putting on a fancy dress. Why does it take our close friends forcing us into these fancy dresses before we feel the strong urge to exercise? Strange, but I have to admit that since my divorce I've steadily dropped a few pounds here and a few there to the point that I'm already at a lower weight than I was when I found out I was pregnant. YEAH to me!! That's also really funny how us women, who are mothers, always use that point in time as the all-forever reference to when we were at our physical bests... "before I found out I was pregnant". But it just can't be helped. Bar the few mutant women out there whose bodies magically go back to that point "before they were pregnant" without them having to work at it, everyone I've ever met or talked to says that after pregnancy their bodies are never the same again.... and that's in a negative way. Motherhood is a blessing though and one of my greatest joys, so I'm not complaining too bad.
Last but not least this afternoon I will drive about 15 minutes to my ex husband's house and pick up my son. I always look forward to these times because seeing him for the first time after 2 and a half days of separation is always when the best hugs and kisses happen. He is 3 years old and full of life, but that first moment is always the same... no matter what. "Mooooooomeeeeee!!!!" while he's running in my direction with his hands outstretched, and the really good part is that he trails the eeee out at the end of Mommy while he's running so it's bouncing in his throat with every step his feet hit. "Mooooomeeee eee eee eee!" My little man is the best there is, and I'm absolutely sure that all the little princesses and other little men out there that are all of your children are the best that there is also. It's a funny thing how that works, and here we are complaining about that extra 10 pounds across our bellies and bottoms when that's the sacrifice sometimes for these little princesses and little men to be here with us!
~ magan33 ~
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